Wednesday, May 29, 2013

The Second Block: A New Nom de Plum

When I first conceived the idea of a blog, the moniker MamaBear seemed to fit.  Throughout my children's teenage years - especially when they toddled off into the workplace, I would call myself MamaBear.  It got to the point where their supervisors and other employees used that moniker when referring to me as well.

But those days are gone.

MamaBear no longer fits.  Especially in the big, bad, adult world of workplace abuse.

Therefore, I felt the need to change my on-line name (and image) from Mama Bear complete with fur, growly behaviour, etc. to being a human being.  Complete with a name.  

My new name is ... TaDa!  Drum roll please ... Cassie Stratford.  A name fabricated totally from the recesses of my admittedly fertile and deranged imagination.

So ... who is Cassie?

I think I'll let her tell you in her own words who she is and how she became part of my world.

My name is Cassie.  And I am your worst nightmare come true.  The girl your mother never told you about.  The one sitting beside you at work who is going to make your life a living hell.

I am a psychopath.  And proud of it.  I love the way I can manipulate people.  Get them to do what I want.  Destroy people.  All the while sitting back, looking for all practical intents and purposes innocent.  Smiling inwardly.  I love it.

Psychopathy is not recognized in the DSMV – the Bible for mental illness (actually I think I'm wrong there but for now I'm leaving this sentence as is).  So, therefore, I don’t exist.  Works perfectly for me.  Even if the designation did exist, since I am cunning, manipulative and deceptive by definition, I am able to con any psychiatrist during an evaluation into believing that I am the genuine article.  And if I can do that to a trained specialist, how much easier is it for me to manipulate my environment?  Unsuspecting co-workers, HR, management, union.  You name it.  I can sway and manipulate them all.  Thus, becoming the winner.

I am a figment of  Suzanne’s imagination.  Born out of a combination of her reading Steven King’s On Writing, her research into workplace bullying, and her boredom during her daily oatmeal soaks.  Also, her recent addiction to and fascination with TV series such as NCIS and Criminal Minds.  The concept of profiling as done on Criminal Minds by the BAU (Behavioural Analysis Unit) fascinates her prompting her to do such Google searches as:  profile of target; profile of a workplace bully; profile of a psychopath, etc.  Ditto, in one of her groups a member who had researched workplace bullying and psychopathy inserted direct quotes from psychopathic blogs.  This too has influenced Suzanne.  I am purely based on perceptions and assumptions; therefore, I am not real.  Although parts of me are real because I am based on the profile Suzanne has researched.  Just as parts of my victim, whoever she may end up being, will be real as they will be based on the profile of the target.  

I must say that Suzanne made an ideal target as she fit very closely with the profile.  The fictional victim, therefore, may bear a lot of resemblance to Suzanne in personality/behavioural factors for that reason alone.  Suzanne was a perfect victim.  At first.  Problem with the real Suzanne was that she was into recovery mode, changing, evolving, ever growing.  Real victims don’t.   They squirm.  Like a worm on a fishhook.  Making them all the more fun to victimize.  Most real victims are easier to get rid of.   Especially the ones on contract.  All you have to do is convince enough people that the contractee doesn’t fit in for whatever real or perceived reason and VoilĂ !  Good riddance.   The target is gone.  

Suzanne wasn’t on contract and she made it clear that she wasn’t going anywhere.  Therefore, drastic measures were in order for the real Suzanne.  For the fictional character, though, while the “bully magnet” features must remain, other pieces can go.  However, just enough of whatever kept her from walking out or resigning needs to stay in to stir up conflict.

These are the beginning paragraphs of a fictional book I started writing over a year ago.  I've since had to stop writing as real life in the form of additional injury and my mother's death plus a broken wrist intervened.  But, for some unknown reason, the character and concept of Cassie has stayed with me.  

As I was toying with the idea of choosing a nom de plume for this blog, the name Cassie kept coming back to me.  So, I grabbed a surname out of thin air.

Since she doesn't exist (outside of my imagination and writing), Cassie can be anyone.

So, for now, because she doesn't exist in my reality, my real world, her name is what I've picked for my new nom de plume.

I, of course, reserve the right to change the nom de plume at any time, without any notice.

Tomorrow:  What should Cassie look like?

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