After the last several posts, so many ideas - or rabbit holes - present themselves. Which way to go? At this point in time?
Months earlier, I was writing the saga of Workplace Abuse situation #1 and got as far as being walked out the door. Just as the workplace dropped me outside the door like yesterday's smelly garbage, I dropped the saga at that point. It was too hard to think about. To remember. To write about. To share.
How best to describe the eighteen months of sheer devastation, confusion and secondary wounding which followed? Especially as I had no way of understanding what I was going through at the time I was going through it?
And how, do I describe that time, that devastation, that secondary wounding to people in such a way that they can understand it? That they get it?
After eighteen months of pure emotional agony, I reached a crisis point. A where the rubber meets the road point. A point where something HAD to happen, HAD to change - or there was no point in going on.
In order to make that time period make sense, I've decided to jump ahead a bit and write down my bibliography. These books/authors became what I call "hidden" mentors in my battle to not only survive but to recover. To come out of the utter devastation of my life and find a way to rebuild.
Remember on this journey of emotional destruction and devastation, there are no contractors to call. No architect to draw up plans for construction crews i.e. electricians, plumbers, bricklayers, carpenters, etc. to follow.
It's all been a trial and error process.
Sometimes I think largely error.
So today, I share with you the resources I've used in this journey.
In later blogs, I will be referring back to these resources, probably one at a time, in order to lay a foundation for the recovery process and to make more sense, by those who know, of what is involved in the journey.
Most of these resources, with the notable exception of the first two which are written by mental health professionals, are by Christian authors - some of whom are also mental health professionals. Which makes sense since I am a Christian. However, even if you are not a Christian, there are things which are appropro to everyone - no matter what your belief system is - or is not.
I invite you to continue following along with me in this on-going journey of discovery and recovery.
Here is my bibliography:
- Trust After Trauma: A Guide to Relationships for Survivors and Those Who Love Them by Aphrodite Matsakis, Ph.D.
- Invisible Heroes: Survivors of Trauma and How They Heal by Belleruth Naparstek
- Helping Those Who Hurt: Reaching Out to Your Friends In Need by Dr. H. Norman Wright
- Why Do Christians Shoot Their Wounded?: Helping (Not Hurting) Those with Serious Emotional Difficulties by Dwight L. Carlson
- Forgive and Forget: Healing the Hurts We Don't Deserve by Lewis B. Smedes
- Healing Grace for Hurting People by Dr. H. Norman Wright and Larry Renetzky, LMFT
- The Process of Forgiveness by William A. Meninger
- The Bully, the Bullied, and the Bystander by Barbara Coloroso
- A New Kind of Normal by Carol Kent
- When I Lay My Isaac Down: Unshakable Faith in Unthinkable Circumstances (Pilgrimage Growth Guide) by Carol Kent
- Between a Rock and a Grace Place: Divine Surprises in the Tight Spots of Life by Carol Kent
- Moving from Fear to Freedom: A Woman's Guide to Peace in Every Situation by Grace Fox
- Surviving the Storms of Life: Finding Hope and Healing When Life Goes Wrong by H. Norman Wright, Matt Woodley & Julie Woodley
- Putting Off Anger: A Biblical Study of What Anger is and What to Do About It by John Coblentz
- Safe People: How to Find Relationships that Are Good for You and Avoid Those That Aren't by Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. John Townsend
- Hurt People Hurt People: Hope and Healing for Yourself and Your Relationships by Sandra D. Wilson Ph.D.
- Fool-Proofing Your Life: An Honorable Way to Deal with the Impossible People in Your Life by Jan Silvious
And no, you are not required to read them all. There will not be a quiz.
After the storm, the clean up begins. After the abuse, recovery begins.