Wednesday, January 28, 2015

Recovery Post Workplace Abuse: 2015 Goals - an update

As you've probably noticed, I like to take pictures.  I like to take pictures of roads, sidewalks, paths, stairs, etc., among other things because each pathway is different intriguing my always active imagination.  Unique.  Each picture signifies, to me, a different aspect of my journey through trauma post workplace abuse.  The path changes constantly.  Sometimes it's easier; sometimes harder.  Sometimes uphill; sometimes down.  Sometimes rougher; sometimes smoother.  Always different as the journey continues.

Always uncharted as there are no maps on this journey signifying where I am on the journey and where I'm going to next.

It's an adventure!  Although one I had not bargained for or willingly signed up for.

As you've probably noticed, my blog postings have been irregular at best.  I start fully intending to be consistent - and then stop unannounced.

This seems to correspond to my life, my journey, at this point.  I seem to be progressing (if that's the right word) in fits and starts.  I start.  Then I stop.  Eventually I lurch forward again.  And the cycle continues.

But when I'm stopped, I'm not exactly fully stopped.  I'm just stopped in a way that cannot be seen by others.  Cannot be visualized.

I'm stopped because my mind is working on significant issues.

Or I'm stopped because I'm reading something.

I'm also stopped because I'm making something.

Or out somewhere taking pictures.

On the exercycle in the basement pumping away - slowly by steadily at this point in time - listening to a story from the Vinyl Cafe which evokes much needed laughter and helps the time pass quicker.  And if you've never listened to the Vinyl Cafe, you are definitely missing something.  Iconic Canada at it's best.

All of these are part of my goals for 2015:  to work on writing by reading; to exercise and be healthier (in other words to regain what I lost after experiencing pneumonia, a cluster migraine and other assorted things which bogged me down last year); going out and taking pictures; knitting and crocheting, etc.

On the reading/writing front - or more accurately the read to write front - I've almost finished the book I chose to begin with called Pathologies by a woman whose workshop on memoir writing I took at a local event called the Wild Writers Literary Event in 2013.  It's not a how-to book, but I was enthralled by the various ways there are to write a memoir, to draw the reader into the event, to make it not just readable but compelling to the reader.  So I chose to begin with her book.  Not really to read her story, but to look at and analyze how she wrote it.

I tend to be a chameleon in some ways.  If I'm reading a certain style, I tend to pick it up and want to mimic it.  And maybe that's a good place to begin - for me.  And then later on as I continue writing to morph into my own style.

One thing, this woman appears to be far more smarter and more literary than I am.  She uses words that even I am not familiar with - and a common saying is that sometimes a person needs a dictionary to talk with me.

During this event, another workplace facilitator asked us what we were currently reading.  I felt like I didn't belong there as one person after another talked about reading something very literary.  Me?  I was currently reading a fiction book by Neta and Dave Jackson called Derailed (from their Windy City series).  Very much fiction.  Light.  Easily readable. Definitely not something that's going to become part of a university course on great literature of the 21st century.  I felt that I didn't really belong in that place, but decided to hide the feeling and pretend at least outwards that I was worthy of attending something called a Literary Event rather than a writer's conference.

Next up, I think, on my reading list will be the above book - also from my stash.  Because this is what I'm interested in writing about.  I have a story to tell - that of workplace abuse and recovery.  I want to tell my story.  But more than that, I want people to read it.  I want them to identify with it.  I want them to internalize it and feel compelled to speak out against bullying in the workplace.  I want to regain - and use - the voice that was taken from me in the workplace.

This third title should also be close to the top of the reading list.  I have so many different interests - and talents.  I can write.  I can make things.  I can take photographs.

These are all talents I want to develop and use.

I've already spoken in this blog today about writing.

With the photography, I already print selected photos and make cards out of them for special people in my life.  Birthdays, illnesses, just to reach out and say "I know you're going through a hard time and I care".  I use them to bless others.  Same with my knitting and crocheting at present.

I made calendars from some of my photos for family at Christmas time.  I share them on Facebook and through Flickr.  I'd like to see if I can expand this and make it marketable.

I use photos to enhance this blog.  To allow people to see what words cannot always adequately express.  To share my life with others.

Then there's the knitting and crocheting.  I attached the below photo of a scarf I was knitting for hubby on an earlier post, noting that the project had been stalled because I'd lost one of the two needles.

The needle was subsequently found (by hubby) and the scarf finished.  Hubby's neck can now be warm when he goes outside.

So, it was on to the next project:  chemo hats for a friend's mother.  The two below were made from the same pattern:  different yarns from my stash though.  And then I got creative on the second one as my imagination kicked in.  I had fun.

Yes, there were will more hats in my future.  Along with other assorted "goodies" like doll clothes for another friend.

There will undoubtedly be more photos in my future.

And writing, yes always the writing.

This is where I will stop for today.  On a more or less positive note.

As I look back on what I've written today, I feel encouraged by what I've accomplished over the past few weeks rather than discouraged at what I've not.

Goals are just that:  goals.  Things to work towards.  Things that will take time to accomplish but will be well worth the effort in the end.

Until next time ....

1 comment:

  1. oooooo, I LOVE the Vinyl Cafe!!! And I totally get what you're saying about being in a crowd of people who read more academic or literary fiction - I'm such a sucker for an easy reading, great story and I often find myself embarrassed when I admit to my 'smart' friends that I'm totally engrossed in some flighty YA novel - not embarrassed enough to change, mind you - I just like it too much ;) Good luck with all your 2015 goals!